Salon Nightmare – Lesson Learned

Over the holidays, I was in one of my very good friend’s wedding. It was a beautiful day and I’m overjoyed for them.

During the preparations for the wedding, I actually decided not to do my own hair and have my friend’s stylist do it. As a bridesmaid, I wanted to participate in all the pampering including getting my hair done. Well, let me tell you that it was one of the biggest mistakes ever.

Although the stylists were black, they had no idea how to take care of natural hair, except to press or relax the hell out of it. I wanted a simple cornrow style in the front of my head and either twist or roller set on the rest. As some of you know, I’ve had trauma on my scalp from my dermatitis, but my hair is in a much better place now and can definitely withstand cornrows as long as they aren’t too tight.

After washing my hair, my hair was pulled and tugged in horrible directions with sometimes a small tooth comb. Let me tell you my hair is not used to being treated like that. No gentleness or care was applied.

When it was time to do the cornrows I was told, that extension hair was needed for a fuller braid. Needless to say I had cornrows in for Halloween and they were fine with only my hair.

Me as a leopard for Halloween - loving my cornrows :-)

I am allergic to extension hair and I would not let them use it. They didn’t like that. I ended up sitting in the chair for count’em FIVE hours only to have flat twists in my hair and bantu knots in the back. Throughout the nightmare, I got comments from the stylists like, “I can’t do it, because I only braid tight – I’m confused”, “since your hair is SO NATURAL, we can’t do this or that” and “because you have a curl pattern this it taking me longer to do” the best one was “if your hair was relaxed, I would be done by now”. CRAZY right. They made me feel like my hair was a nuisance for them and that is not how you should feel when your are paying customer and when they are providing a service. That was the hair prep day.

Needless to say, I finished my hair myself the next day and tried to put as much love as possible into it. I was not happy, especially since I know I could have done a better job myself, instead of paying someone to treat my hair like crap.

My wedding hair - not my favourite, definitely could have been better.

This experience made me realize that doing your research about a stylist is very important. You can’t just let any “black” person touch your hair. You cannot assume that because they look like you that they know how to respect your precious curls.

Lastly, even though the experience was traumatic, it made me realize how proud I am be natural and that it’s important for more black women to let their curls be free. We need to put the pressure on our people who are stylists to learn the proper way how to take care of the natural hair that grows out of our scalps, instead of focusing on learning ways to manipulate our natural hair.  

Have you had a similar experience? Share your story ...

Blessings and Curls, 
B-Curlie

Featured Curlie - Crystal L.

Name: Crystal L.

Hometown: Toronto, Canada

First year of curlieness: September 2010 is when I had my last relaxer. April 2012 is when I consider my hair journey began.

Why I went curlie: Back in September 2010 when I had my last relaxer, I didn't have any plan to go natural--in fact the idea came much later on. I had a chin-length bob cut that I would get relaxed and reshaped at an expensive downtown salon every six weeks.  When it came time to get my next relaxer I was dreading the high cost for a 'master stylist', the long salon wait, and the  eventual disappointment that many women experience--when they leave the salon with a fabulous look that they can't recreate after they wash their hair at home. As a temporary solution to my frizzy roots I put my hair in braids with the intention of giving myself a month break from relaxing. But as time went on, I loved the easy maintenance of the braids and would have them re-braided time and time again. After five to six months of braiding I was able to see enough of my new hair growth to appreciate the texture and thickness and decided that I would just transition my hair using braids. 

Transitioning with braids.

By this time I had turned 30 and having had relaxers since I was nine years old, I realized that my hair was the one part of my being, where I felt I had little control over and knew even less about. I also didn't like the idea of being dependent on a chemical process to feel comfortable about my appearance (even though I was constantly trying to treat split ends and hair damage from the relaxer). I wanted to nurture a relationship with my tresses and knew that it would be a long road to get to a length that I was comfortable with. After growing my hair through braids for a year and a half I made the decision to do chop off my relaxed ends and start my new hair journey.

Regime and products: Since I'm a newbie to natural hair care, I am experimenting with a wide-range of products and regimens. Products that I'm using and love are: pure cocoa-shea butter, pure argan oil, ApHogee Pro-Vitamin Leave-In Conditioner, and Taliah Waajid's CurlyCurl Cream. These days I'm wearing braid-outs more often than twist-outs. I find braids take a longer time to do but they define and hold my curls longer. I like to co-wash at least once per week and re-braid my dampened hair before bed.

Rocking a stunning braid-out.

The best part of being curlie for me is: The best part of being curlie for me is to be able to look in the mirror, see my freshly done hair, and know that I did it myself and that it's all 100% Crystal. Yes, the unpredictability of my hair can be quite the challenge (oh no frizz!!), but I love knowing that my hair's beauty comes from being imperfectly perfect--just like me!

Is there anything else you'd like to add:

My advice for those thinking about going natural, but don't know if they can make the commitment, is to focus on the POSITIVES of wearing natural hair and capitalize on them. For example, I like style diversity and length (I'm not crazy about 'fros) and I needed a way to grow out my hair without having to worry about maintaining two hair textures-- so braiding was a great transitional hairstyle for me. Finding an experienced braider who is attentive and creative can mean that you can wear a new braided hairstyle every month until you are ready to take on the day-to-day maintenance of curly hair. Cornrows (especially thicker ones) can protect your new growth as long as you re-braid your hair and trim it regularly, in addition to moisturizing your braids every day (using store-bought or home-made braid spray).  

Thanks for sharing Crystal!

Find out how to be a Featured Curlie, email me at canadiancurlie2010@gmail.com

Blessings and Curls,
B-Curlie

Featured Curlie - Angela

 Angela is an inspiration not only as a Curlie, but also spiritually and physically. She has a such positive attitude while living with her disability. It's my pleasure to feature her. Thanks for being a part of my blog Angela!!!

Name: Angela Njoku     

Hometown: Halifax, Nova Scotia

First year of curlieness: 1996

Why I went curlie: When I was sixteen, my hair was straightened with a chemical relaxer.  As I got older, I found the relaxer chemicals to be too harsh for my fine hair.  By the time I was twenty-five, I noticed that the colour of my hair was changing to a coppery almost blonde colour at some parts.  I figured that this was a sign of damage to the hair and possibly to my scalp.  I decided to go natural.  I waited until I grew about a centimeter of natural hair under the relaxed hair, and then went to a salon and had the relaxed hair chopped off.  The hairstylist was tentative about cutting off my hair because my hair was shoulder length at the time.  But when it was cut to an afro, I felt refreshed and rejuvenated.  As time went by, I noticed that my hair became stronger and healthier.

I kept my hair in a very short style that framed my face (about half a centimeter in length) for about five years before deciding to grow it out.  My biggest challenges with being natural were finding products for natural hair, finding a hairstylist who was skilled in handling natural hair, and figuring out different ways to style my hair. 

Seven years ago, my health deteriorated to the point that I became disabled.  I thank God that my hair was natural at the time because I became too sick to visit a salon or do my hair myself; if I still had the relaxed hair I would have had to cut it all off.  But I receive home care, and my home support worker has been taking care of my hair for me among other things.  For the last five years she has washed, combed, styled and occasionally trimmed my hair when I couldn’t do it myself.  She visits twice a month, and I manage my hair the rest of the time. Thank God that my health is turning around now, so I am able to do a little more with my hair and occasionally get out to a salon for a trim and conditioning treatment. The reason why I mention this is to encourage anyone who is considering going natural.  If I can keep my hair natural while dealing with a disability, you can do it!

Angela with a cornrow braidout.

Regime and products:
The frequency in which I wash my hair is based on its length and how my scalp feels.  It’s a little bit longer than shoulder length now, so it is washed twice a month.  (But when it was very short, I had to wash it every 2 days, and when it was chin length it had to be washed once a week.)  If I wash it too often, it becomes dry and my scalp itches.

Presently, I am using a natural shampoo called Hygenic, made by local hairdresser, Pauline Patten-Bailey of Hy-Style Beauty Care here in Halifax (website coming soon; see below for more information).  Pauline has developed a line of natural hair care products called Bailey Hair Care Products.   When I became disabled, I could no longer comb my thick hair.  But I discovered Bailey‘s Curl In Curl Out, which softens my hair so that it is a little easier for me to comb. I apply it every six months. 

One of Angela's favourite products from her stylist Pauline Patten-Bailey.

I also use Bailey‘s Bedew, a leave-in conditioner, after washing and as a daily moisturizer.  I use natural Shea Butter as a scalp and hair moisturizer.  It was given to me by a friend, but can be purchased in stores. The Shea Butter prevents my scalp from going dry and flaky during the winter months.  It also produces fantastic results when my hair is flat ironed.

I try not to fuss with my hair with too much combing, heat or product.  If it’s not dry or tangled but is soft and shiny, I know that all is well, so I leave it alone.  If not, I add moisturizer, condition it or use less heat on my hair.  (I try not to flat iron more than three times in one month.)  I make sure to get it trimmed every two months to prevent hair breakage and tangling at the ends. I also maintain a healthy diet, and try to eat carrots regularly to encourage a healthy scalp and hair growth.

Angela's wash-n-go look.

The best part of being curlie for me is: I like variety, so I have been one to change my hairstyle frequently. I love curly hair, because of the fact that it can be styled in many different ways with relative ease. It can be in its natural state or afro, locked, twisted, flat twisted, braided, flat ironed, straightened with thread, corn-rowed, you can add extensions to it, and so on.  Also, undoing a hairstyle (like twists or corn-rows) can create another hairstyle. An added bonus, I find, is that that curly hair (mine is quite curly) can hold a hairstyle for a long time, so it does not have to be changed every day if one wants to keep a style for a few days or weeks. My home support worker gives me a style that will last for two to four weeks.

One challenge about being curlie is that, no matter what style it is in, once my hair gets wet, damp or is exposed to humidity, it reverts to its natural curl.  I’ve lost a few hair dos after sweating or taking a bath!

Maintaining my hair in its natural state has been considerably less expensive than in those days when I used a chemical straightener, which to me, is another big bonus and reason why I have stayed natural all of these years.  Last, but not least, my hair is healthy, I am happy with it, and it looks better than ever!  That is the reason why I wanted to go natural in the first place: to have healthy hair that I could feel good about.

For you Canadian Curlies in Halifax, Pauline’s hair salon is located at 349A Herring Cove Road, Halifax; telephone 902.431.0556.

The Truth about Transitioning

Those of you who follow my blog, know that my curls appeared as a result of transitioning for nine months. I was not ready to just break out with a huge big chop. I wanted time to get to know my growing curls. But, I wanted to talk about a few things you may go through if this is the journey you’ve chosen for your curls.

What is transitioning?
It’s when women decide to grow out their processed hair and cut it off at a pace that is comfortable for them.

Transitioning regime?
Use your favourite deep conditioner and if time allows do so with every wash. Be sure to apply a detangling leave-in conditioner, water-based moisturizer and a natural oil for sealing.

What styles can be worn while transitioning?

How long should you transition?
This is a very personal decision. You and only you will know how much of dealing with two textures of hair you can take. Your new growth will be stronger and healthier than your processed ends, but transitioning is about taking care of both at the same time. Some people last one week, while others can go on for two years. Make up your mind and the best part about it is you can always shorten or lengthen the journey at any time. It’s your hair not anyone else’s. So take control of it!

What should you expect while transitioning?
It’s not easy, and it’s definitely a labour of love and it needs to be, otherwise you will end up relaxing or processing your hair again. Another thing people should remember is that patience is necessary as your curls will not just pop up overnight, especially if you plan to do a long transition.

During your transition you will have moments of triumph and frustration, but all of these experiences will make you appreciate the true beauty and strength of your hair and will as a women with afro-textured hair. Embrace it!

Blessings and Curls,
B-Curlie